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The memories of me will seem more like bad dreams [entries|friends|calendar]

My heart is darker than these oceans, My heart is frozen underneath. We are crooked souls trying to stay up straight, dry eyes in the pouring rain, well the shadow proves the sunshine. To scared that I'll run always. Hold fast to the break of day light were, the shadow proves the sunshine.

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Wendy 101 [Sat/Sep/2006 at 8:14pm]
Here's a list of things about myself. I'm not sure why I did it but feel free to add any observations of your own. 

1. I don't balance my checkbook.
2. All of my credit cards are maxed out and my chances of getting out of debt any time soon are slimmer than Nicole Richie.
3. I am obsessed with reading memoirs.
4. I love when I have mostly quarters in my change purse.
5. My toes cramp up randomly.
6. I enjoy talking about my bodily functions with people. Some people actually think it's cool, not gross.
7. My sister has enough information about me to make me her personal slave, for life.
8. Sometimes I talk to myself aloud... In a bad British accent.
9. I have two very different personalities that battle eachother in my head. I still don't know which one I really am.
10. Reading the above statement makes me sound like I have psychological problems, I assure you, that's not the case.
11. I've always wanted to get my future read by a gypsy with a crystal ball and dangly earrings.
12. I always repeat the same mistakes.
13. I laugh at myself when I fart.
14. I love food so much.
15. I have a rather long list of things to do before I die. I'm scared I won't get any of them done because i'm too lazy.
16. I procrastinate, i'm disorganized, forgetful, I over book, I sell out my friends sometimes, and I hate it. Yet, I do nothing about it.
17. When I want to organize my life I buy a planner. Usually, two or three pages are written in and the rest goes to waste. Sometimes I want to organize myself again and I pull out the planners only to discover that it's last years. At which point a buy another one and do the same thing over again.
18. The last time I wanted to get organized, I didn't have the money to buy a new planner so I just used an outdated one by crossing out the day of the week and writing a new one. It got too tedious so I stopped. I tell myself that if that planner was new it would have worked this time... that's probably a lie.
19. I give my pets very strange names. I never feel bad for them.
20. I don't clean my fishbowl as often as I should.
21. Sometimes I lie for no reason at all. I find this bad habit is diminishing though.
22. I thought I had an addictive personality until my friends pointed out that I quit cigarettes and weed cold turkey for no reason at all... and it was easy.
23. I buy things and I don't wear them. Then I give them to my sister. When she wears them I realize how cute it is I want it back. I let her keep it though.
24. I envy a lot of people that I probably shouldn't.
25. I love thunderstorms. I own a CD that plays thunderstorm sounds. 26. I get pimples. Alot.
27. I have netflix. It's made me a hermit.
28. My sister and I have activities we only do with eachother. Like watch the Sex and the City DVDs.
29. I'm not sure how to spell the plural of Netflix so I left it out of the above sentence.
30. I hate when people misuse, it's, its, too, to, their, there, where, were, etc. It also bugs me when people misuse appostrophes.
31. I'm probably never going to grow up.
32. My mom watches too many news stories and as as direct result is overly paranoid.
33. I've tried to become a vegetarian more than once to no avail. I'm going to keep trying.
34. I love animals and nature. I'm so happy that i'm majoring in environmental studies.
35. Sometimes I go over two weeks without shaving my legs.
36. I don't understand why I get so shy sometimes.
37. I was a Fire Explorer because it was my dream to be a firefighter/paramedic.
38. Sometimes I really wish I was black.
39. I've always wanted to be fat for a day.
40. I can't gain weight no matter how hard I try.
41. Sometimes I think people look at me and think I have an eating disorder. So I don't go to the bathroom after I eat so people don't think i'm barfing up my food.
42. As I write this i'm wondering who's gonna read it.
43. I love love love putting q-tips in my ear and rotating them it gives me a tingly feeling.
44. I didn't think this list would take so long.
45. I let dogs lick my face.
46. I look up to my brother and look out for my sister.
47. I overspend on the people I love.
48. I seek approval from others.
49. One time my friend told me that i'm "that girl", the one that everybody likes. I played it cool but my heart secretly jumped in my chest for weeks.
50. I like being "that girl".
51. I trust my friends.
52. I love my brother alot, he probably has no idea how much. He made my life alot better when I was younger.
53. My little sister is the closest person to me.
54. I love my mom even though she's crazy sometimes.
55. I like to play the victim sometimes. Wait, alot of times.
56. I'm a complete bookworm, But not with school books.
57. I do minimal work and miss classes and I still manage really good grades. I don't even know how I do it.
58. I'm afraid that i'm not living my life to the fullest.
59. I pretend not to like it when guys stare but in reality it makes me feel good about myself.
60. I don't give myself enough credit.
61. I don't know what I would do without my family.
62. I adore Nicole Richie ever since I started watching The Simple Life.
63. I want to move to New York.
64. I'm a horrible driver.
65. I poop and pee really fast. If I take a book to the bathroom with me I can't even get a sentence in before i'm done and that annoys me.
66. I'm the queen of TMI.
67. I have secrets.
68. I can't wait to see what my life turns out like.
69. I'm terrified of public speaking.
70. I find overcautious people funny. But then I laugh at myself because sometimes I can be overcautious too.
71. I have too many t-shirts.
72. I really like it when people call me witty. I like it more than when they call me pretty.
73. I have cried during 99% of the movies i've watched.
74. Sometimes I say mean things out loud to be funny but inside I feel really bad about them.
75. I donate coins to homeless people.
76. I laugh and smile alot.
77. Sometimes I think that one day i'm gonna get attacked by Clinton and Stacy from What Not to Wear.
78. I have random cleaning attacks where I have to clean everything. I feel really good afterwards.
79. I like feeling accomplished.
80. When I look back, I realized that i've never really worked hard for anything. This upsets me.
81. I eat fast food 2 or more times a day, This completley contradicts with my entire belief system.
82. I recycle every chance I get.
83. I once saw this man at Publix and everything he was buying was organic, and then he used his own canvas bags instead of Publix's plastic ones. I wanted to drop everything and hug him.
84. I'm sensitive and emotional.
85. I like that people like me, but i'm still not sure why they do.
86. Makeup wise, I only wear powder and mascara. If i'm going to work i'll wear some eyeshadow. I like that I keep it simple.
87. I have really really long eyelashes.
88. I put lotion all over my body every time I get out of the shower. I have really soft skin.
89. I have a love/hate relationship with my hair.
90. I make up fantasies in my head about what my life would be like if I lived in NY. Then I get depressed because they're unrealistic.
91. I have different clusters of friends. They're all separate. I like this.
92. I'm addicted to The Sims2. Alot.
93. My life is really good but sometimes I wish I had another one. Then I feel guilty for being unappreciative.
94. I'm a liberal and I don't like Republicans. Especially Cuban ones that are Republicans just because tradition says so. So. Damn. Ignorant.
95. I hate my legs. People say they're nice so then I think i'm being stupid. But then I think that they're just trying to make me feel better about myself. So I don't believe them. I don't wear mini skirts.
96. I can't wait until Nicole comes back.
97. I really like my eyebrows.
98. When I grow up, I want to adopt.
99. The world situation right now really scares me.
100. Sometimes I don't wear socks.
101. I like the smell of fresh laundry.
102. I passed 101 things already.
103. I have this crazy love for Armando.
104. I enjoy PB&J.
105. I start journals. I never finish them.
106. I believe in the paranormal and it scares the living crap out of me. 107. I believe in life on other planets. I think people who don't are egocentric.
108. Sometimes when I read horoscopes and believe them, most of the times I don't.
109. I own too many shoes.
110. I burp out loud.
111. I want to make my family proud.
112. My real father called me the other day after not speaking to him for ~10 years. I still thik he's an assface.
113. Sometimes I get into a bad mood by the mere sight of a particular person.
114. My drawer where I keep all my financial stuff is rather messy.
115. I don't like reffy Cubans.
116. There are alot more things I want to add, except no one will read that far.
break of daylight.

[Mon/Aug/2006 at 7:49pm]
This song is hot as fuhhhh.

Come here big boy

You've been a bad, bad boy
I'm gonna take my time so enjoy
There's no need to feel no shame
Relax and sip upon my champagne
Cos I wanna give you a little taste
Of the sugar below my waist
You nasty boy

I'll give you some ooh la la
voulez-vous coucher avec moi
I got you breaking into a sweat
Got you hot, bothered and wet
You nasty boy (nasty naughty boy)

Baby for all it's worth
I swear I'll be the first to blow your mind
Now if you're ready, come and get me
I'll give you that hot, sweet, sexy lovin' (lovin')

Hush now don't say a word
I'm gonna give you what you deserve
Now you better give me a little taste
Put your icing on my cake
You nasty boy (boy)

Oh no

Ooh there I go again
I need a spanking coz I've been bad
So let my body do the talkin'
I'll slip you that hot, sweet, sexy lovin' (lovin')

Come on daddy
Ooh ooh ohh
ooh ooh yeah
Come on, sugar

I got you breaking into a sweat
Got you hot, bothered and wet
You nasty boy (nasty naughty boy)

Baby for all it's worth
I swear I'll be the first to blow your mind
Now that you're ready, give it to me
Just gimme that hot, sweet, sexy lovin' (lovin')

Now gimme a little spanking
Is that all you got
Come on now
Don't play with me
Give me that hot, sweet, nasty
Boy don't you make me wait
You better give me a little taste
Put your icing on my cake
You nasty boy
050 break of daylight.

[Tue/Aug/2006 at 8:43pm]
I don't want to speak of my visit to the doctor. So, on a lighter note...


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WITHOUTCollapse )

040 break of daylight.

[Tue/Aug/2006 at 1:23am]
Tomorrow morning I go to the Doctor to get checked. I'm nervous. :/
010 break of daylight.

[Fri/Aug/2006 at 12:52am]
So California was so much fun. Met some really cool people, kinda made me wanna marry a Marine and move out there. Which, wouldn't have been hard because I was appearently a big hit over there with themmm boysss. Which is fine by me. Hahaha. There's nothing like a man in uniform I tell you. It was alot of fun. I met three of Nicole's friends, one of which I want to bring home and keep here forever. She's so much fun. We had the passion party which was great, I got drunk a few times, which was really great. My self esteem went up like WHOAH because I was being told how beautiful I was constantly. :] Life was good over there. I accomplished pretty much everything I set out for and more. It was nice, can't wait until next time I go. Which I hope is sooner rather than later.

Alright, alright.
I'm out beeshes.
break of daylight.

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